I feel helpless. My emotions aretrouncing my better sense. I've placed one call a day for the past fivedays. He hasn't returned a single one. Unfortunately, each one soundsmore desperate than the last. I've been using a dildo to fuck myself to sleep and waking the same way.I imagine it's him and not just some rigid piece of rubber. I imagine myhand is his as I lick the cum from my fingers. I don't even touch myselfanymore, I cum just from being fucked. But I have to be fucked to cum.Why does that make me feel proud?I made such a mess of things down on the cape last weekend. Ioverreacted. I just go so jealous seeing that queen kiss Daniel, I blewup. I behaved like a brat, a spoiled brat. I saw them kiss and Ifreaked. I don't know what came over me. I'm so ashamed. I had no rightto be jealous. He doesn't owe me a thing. Now if only I could get Danielto understand that I just panicked. So many feelings, so many emotions,I ran away.I'm 27 and I've never felt like this. I've been hurt. I wanted to, but it was too late so I sat and waited for the storm to begin. “I know for sure some of this is pure fantastical bullshit but are they all? Is any of this about your own under the blanket adventures?”“I changed names but some are real life, some are fiction.”“Not fiction, fantasies”“Is there a difference?”“Fiction is something plausible but made up, fantasy is more like a dream or desire for something that can’t or won’t happen.” Marla paused, “Those stories about you and me are pure fantasy. How in hell could you even write things like that? I would never fuck you, not even in my nightmares and you should know that, I slapped you down to many times.”As we were growing through puberty my sister turned from a unisex stick figure into an alluring young woman and as my balls got hairier I approached her several times to experiment with me, to play around and have sex. I was a horny beginner and girls scared the crap out of me but Marla was always near and for some reason.
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